I’m Vanesa, I’m 21 years old and I work at REDMYH as an advocate – accompanying women who are terminating their pregnancies.
I became interested in feminist issues from a very young age. I started attending workshops when I was 11 or 12 years old and little by little, I got involved in courses on STI prevention, unplanned pregnancy, menstruation and similar topics. I became more interested in abortion in the last three years or so.
I previously knew about abortion, but I didn’t dare to provide support because I felt it was something very emotionally intense. I didn’t feel ready until about a year and a half ago, when I decided to accompany someone. My first time supporting someone through their abortion was for a friend in high school. At first my sister was accompanying her but she told me that she felt more comfortable with me, and asked me if I could support her. I said, ‘Well, I have the information and everything, so if you want and you feel more comfortable with me, then let’s do it.’
Young people have the right to make decisions about our bodies.
We have the right to recognise that we may not be ready to be mothers. That no one should impose this decision on us, but rather that we should make it when we want to, and when we are ready.
Campeche, where I live, is a very conservative place. Some of my family know about the work that I do but it’s not something you talk about here. But I don’t mind being the black sheep of the family, I’m going to do what I think is right.
Many of my classmates know me for the work I do, and that’s great in some ways, but sometimes I worry about the potential for negative backlash from the tutors. But honestly, the fact they have their eye on me, just motivates me to keep doing the work and makes me proud of what I do.
I’m proud of the support network we’ve created.
When we started the network of acompañantes on the mainland, there were only a few of us, but little by little, other girls started to get involved and take an interest in these issues.
And seeing that we are now a large network of women from various states on the peninsula motivates me and makes me proud. If anyone has any questions, they come to us or ask us in the group chats, and we’re there talking and giving feedback. If anyone feels bad about having gone through a process with someone that was emotionally draining, they also know that they can come to us.
Something that motivates me is always the gratitude of the girls we accompany. Recently, a girl messaged to say, ‘Thank you so much, you don’t know how much you’ve changed my life.’ When I read that, it made me so emotional that I cried a little, because that’s such an important recognition of our work. And a lot of the work we do is happening behind the scenes. Keeping track of schedules, a group of us awake at three in the morning, checking in on each other.
So when people say thank you very much for helping me, it’s really meaningful to me and it makes me emotional to talk about it.
We want to support people in a place where they feel safe.
The first question I always ask the people I am accompanying is, ‘Do you have a place where you feel comfortable to go through the process?’
I’ve never been there in person for an accompaniment. I’m always on the phone or we do it online, but during these calls I always check they are in a safe and comfortable place and that they feel calm.
I always tell them in the first session that my goal is for you to feel safe and to leave here without any doubts because that helps you go through the process in a more peaceful way.
Of all the girls I’ve accompanied, almost always at the beginning they arrive with fear and concern about being judged. So we always emphasise to them that we’re not here to judge them, that it’s their decision, that what they want to do is fine. There are girls who, at some point, say they don’t want to continue with the process, and we tell them that’s fine, it’s okay.
Interview with Vanesa Rodríguez Casanova, advocate at REDMYH, a SAAF grantee partner in Mexico.